


you're the universe i'm helpless in

by posielegacie



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, havent written in a while, so pls excuse the rustiness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-09 14:58:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17409005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/posielegacie/pseuds/posielegacie
Summary: On the night of Josie Saltzman's sixteenth birthday, her evil ex pulled her in for a kiss. In the heat of the moment, Josie kissed her back as they forgot, just for a little, that exes don’t make-out with each other. But as soon as Josie remembered, she pulled away and that was it. She walked away and left Penelope Park standing there.On her retreat with her mother, Josie tried her best to forget about her momentary lapse in judgement. Now, she’s back at the Salvatore Boarding School and she makes an impulsive decision that leads her relationship with Penelope down a path she's not so sure she wants.





	1. i need her out of my life

“But mom, please! Can’t you stay just for a little bit longer?” Lizzie pleads, much like a child does at a toy store.  

The twins had just gotten out of their mother's car, backpacks and all, and are now walking towards the school, followed by their mother.

“I’m sorry girls, but I have to leave tomorrow. The work that I’m doing is crazy important and any day off is a day wasted,” Caroline responds.  

The twins stop dead in their tracks. The immediate shifts in her daughters’ expressions quickly made the mother realize her poor choice of words.  

“Wasted? Since when is spending time with your daughters a _waste_ of time?” Lizzie asks angrily, as they stood by the school’s entrance. “I know we’ve been together for the past four days, but that’s hardly enough to make up for how long you’ve been gone.” 

“I know, and I’m really, really sorry bu—”  

“Hey girls! How was the trip?” Ric interrupts, beaming with a smile.  

“Great, until mom admitted that we’re a waste of her time.” Lizzie scoffs, brushing past her dad. 

“Wait, Lizzie! That’s not what I mea—” Caroline is interrupted again, this time by Josie. 

“You already said it mom. The damage is done.”  

The dark-haired twin stands there for a second, visibly upset but not wanting to say anything more. She looks at her dad’s confused face before walking away from her parents and going through the doors of the school herself. 

As she walks away, she hears her father saying “Caroline, what the hell did you do?”, but she feels numb as memories of Jo come flooding back.  

Honestly, Josie had forgotten her – or at least the pain of seeing her disappear – for a little bit during their trip with Caroline; but now, she is recalling all of the events of her sixteenth birthday. Seeing Jo for the first time, getting to know her, and Jo getting to know Josie. Josie even did something for herself and planned to go to the party with Jo – but then it turned out that Jo was possessed. Josie ended up being buried alive soon after, where she had to be saved by MG, Hope and Penelope. And then after that, Josie was walking back from the showers when Penelope... Oh my God, Penelope.  

The soft-hearted girl is hit with a terrible realization, and all she knows is that she absolutely cannot talk to, or even see her ex right now. Nearing her room, she shifts her eyes to the ground and keeps them there – afraid of even the sight of Penelope.  

When Josie opens the door to her room, she finds her twin’s bags on the floor but not Lizzie herself. Josie is relieved, as she can’t imagine having to deal with Lizzie’s banter right now. She just needs rest. That’s exactly what she gets when her head meets her pillow and she closes her eyes.  

In her daze, Josie dreams vividly. She sees random images of her dad and her mom, in a room together with Jo. Josie seems to be in the room too, but she’s confused. Then for some reason, she leaves the room and meets MG, with Hope right behind him. She feels as if someone is missing, and that’s when she sees Penelope at the end of a weirdly long hallway, smiling at her as she usually does. Time stops and they gaze at one another, Josie becoming increasingly angered by her ex’s sly grin. Heated, Josie’s legs start to swiftly take her towards Penelope. She thinks she passes by Lizzie crying with Rafael trying to comfort her, but she hones in on Penelope smiling at her and she walks even faster, fire in her steps. When she finally reaches Penelope, all she wants to do is yell at her. 

“I h—”  

Just then, Josie is yanked from her dream and wakes up to someone knocking on her door. Still disoriented, Josie gets up and is about to open the door when she stops herself, realizing that it might be Penelope. 

“Josie, it’s me.”  

It’s Rafael. 

Josie hesitates, but ultimately opens the door. She needs to give him a piece of her mind for what he did to Lizzie. 

“Hey.”  

“What are you doing here, Raf?”

Josie deadpans as she turns around to busy herself with the backpack she used for the trip. As she turns, she sees that it’s no longer day time, but she acts unaffected though she’s surprised that she slept for that long. 

“Um, well… First of all, I wanted to welcome you back.”  

Josie doesn’t say anything. Instead, she takes her clothes out from her backpack and starts organizing them. 

“… and I also wanted to apologize.”  

Josie looks up. “For what, exactly?” 

“For acting out. After you voted against Landon staying, I mean. Josie I’m sorry, I can get really angry sometimes and—” 

“Does your anger explain why you stood Lizzie up at her own birthday?” Josie asks as she gets close to Rafael, challenging him. 

“I didn’t stand her up. I came but…” 

“But then you broke her heart by telling her that sleeping with her was a mistake. Yeah, I’m well aware, Raf.” Josie retorts, staring at the apologetic boy.  

“Look Josie, before that happened, I was talking with Hope and I realized that—” 

“Since when does Hope—”  

“Josie please, if you could let me finish.” 

Josie sighs, indicating to Rafael that he continue explaining. 

“At first, I wanted everything to be perfect for Lizzie and… I haven’t exactly been an escort before, so I asked Hope for some help,” Rafael starts. “Then, we got into a whole argument about Landon and we just ended up getting angry at each other. Cassie got brought up and well, what Hope said to me was right.” 

“What did she say?” 

“She said that trying to make up for Cassie with Lizzie wasn’t going to be good to me, or to Lizzie. I mean, I didn’t even realize that’s what I was doing at first, but she was right. I didn’t have feelings for your sister and it wasn’t fair for me to pretend like I did, just because I slept with her.” 

“If that’s how you felt, then you shouldn’t have slept with Lizzie in the first place.” 

“I know, and I’m sorry. I already apologized to Lizzie too. When I saw her earlier, I was going to apologize again but to be honest, she seemed preoccupied with some other guy. I think she might be over the whole thing.” 

 Josie knows that Lizzie isn’t over Rafael. She knows because Lizzie could barely stop talking about him during their retreat with their mom. She also remembers Lizzie telling her that she was going to try to distract herself with one of the vampires. “Maybe Jake will suck me dry and end my misery,” Lizzie told her.  

Josie understands where Rafael is coming from though, but she couldn’t see why he would let Lizzie believe he stood her up. 

“You could’ve at least been there for Lizzie during her entrance.”  

“Hey, now that wasn’t my fault. I don’t know why, but Penelope used a barrier spell to keep me and Hope inside the gym for an hour.”  

Josie froze. Penelope, really? It’s like she can’t avoid her. Somewhere, somehow, Penelope finds a way into her life, even in the most unlikely places. This was supposed to be about Rafael and Lizzie, but there she is, squeezing into the narrative out of nowhere. Josie is tired of Penelope always showing up when  _she_ broke up with  _her_.  _This has got to stop_ , Josie thought. _I need her out of my life_.  

Suddenly, an impulse takes over Josie. She grabs Rafael’s face and desperately kisses him. Maybe if he feels something for her, she can finally move on from Penelope. She can start over with someone new, then maybe Penelope will take the hint and leave her alone. But Rafael isn’t really kissing her back, if anything, he seems more in shock. As she starts to regret her decision, she hears a voice in the distance. 

“Hey Josie, why is your do—”  

The soft-hearted twin recognizes the voice a little too late, because when she unlocks her lips from Rafael’s, Penelope is already standing by the door. 

“Oh.”  

When she sees Penelope looking at her as if her heart had been thrown across the room, there’s no question that Josie definitely regrets her decision now. 

The Gemini witch wants to say something, but no matter how hard she tries, she can’t seem to come up with words to say. She mentally braces for impact, unsure of what her ex will do.  

A few seconds go by and then... Penelope’s face softens as she attempts to present a faint smile.  

Now it’s Josie’s heart that's thrown across the room. She wasn't sure what exactly she was bracing for, but it definitely wasn't _that_. She's never seen the short-haired girl look so... disheartened.

“Um, sorry for interrupting. It’s been a while, so I just… wanted to see how you were doing,” Penelope says softly to Josie. “But I can see you’re busy, so I’ll just go,” She continues, her voice faltering. Clearly shaken up under her guise, she leaves before Josie can say anything to her. 

“Shit.”  

Distressed, Josie distances herself from the equally shocked boy in front of her. The conflicted twin stands there as she replays hearing Penelope's voice one second, and then seeing her crestfallen eyes the next. Is this what she really wants?

“I’m sorry, I- I don’t know what the hell that was, Raf. I just… I don’t know. When it comes to Penelope I just—” Her legs weaken and she falls on to her bed as tears form in her eyes. “I just really don’t know what the fuck to feel anymore.”  

Saying this pulls on her heart strings and she feels the pain radiate from her heart to the rest of her body. Josie is sobbing now. Rafael sits with the aching twin and holds her, not saying anything. Josie allows herself to cry into his arms.  

Penelope makes her feel so many emotions – too many. The worst part is, Josie can get endlessly angry at her for leaving her, but then she sees Penelope with so much pain in her eyes and _that_ hurts her more than anything else. It only reminds Josie that Penelope cares. Hard. And she knows that all Penelope wants is for her to care more for herself, but Josie’s not sure if she can promise that to her. That isn’t who she is, and it’s never been who she is. Being selfish and trying to have more for herself only means that she has more to lose in the end. And she’s already lost Penelope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everyone! thanks for checking out my lil fic (: 
> 
> it's been a while since i've written in general, and even longer since i've written a fic so sorry if it's kinda messy or if the pacing is weird. i really want to make it a more enjoyable read so if you guys have constructive criticism pls let me know!! 
> 
> the next chapter is mostly from penelope's perspective w some lizzie interactions, and i was actually going to include it in chapter 1 but i wanted to refine it a little bit more so yall can look forward to that 
> 
> i also need mutuals on my twt so hit me up @posielegacie im friendly i promis >:)


	2. well, she's definitely a heroin-something

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penelope Park does some classic Penelope Park stuff, except it doesn't exactly end as she planned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some fluff to wash away a lil bit of the angst from last chapter
> 
> my twt is @posielegacie if u wanna be friends (:

_Knock. Knock. Knock._  

“Hellooooo. Satan, are you there? Dark Lord? Evil one?”

Lizzie groans. She’s standing behind Penelope’s door knocking, but she gets no response. 

“If you must know, Mr. Williams asked me to check on you. Just say ‘I’m okay’ or – actually, ‘Leave me alone, bitch’ is probably more in your lane. I don’t care really, just say something.”  

Silence. 

“Penelope?” 

Still nothing. 

Disgruntled, but slightly concerned, the blonde twin rolls her eyes and places her hand on the door. She siphons magic and as she’s about to use it, Penelope opens the door. 

“What do you want, Saltzman?” The short-haired girl grumbles, still in her sleeping clothes.  

“Not that I care, but you weren’t in first-hour class and no one knew why, so Mr. Williams sent me.” 

“Why are you the one even checking on me? He could’ve sent Hope or Jo—” Penelope catches herself. “—or literally anyone else in this goddamn school.”  

“Don’t flatter yourself, Queen of the Underworld. You know me, I love charity work.” The blonde grins, proud of her new name for the witch standing in front of her. 

“Yeah, whatever. I overslept, that’s all.”  

The skeptical twin squints her eyes at Penelope and crosses her arms. 

“Okay bye,” Penelope says as she grabs the door to close it.  

Lizzie holds the door open. 

“Nice try, but rarely anyone oversleeps around here. The morning bell is so loud, the beds practically shake. Plus, you may be rude, cold-hearted, mean, devoid of feelings, and just terrible all around, but you never miss Mr. William’s class – unless you have like, lady cramps or something.” 

The dark-haired witch purses her lips to stop herself from retaliating. She has no idea how being ‘devoid of feelings’ is correlated to her never missing class, but instead of checking Lizzie she says, “Sure, say that.”  

“Say what?” 

“That I have lady cramps, or whatever you called it.” 

“Yeah, that’s not happening. You’re probably up to something, and whatever it is, I need to know. In the end, I’ll be the heroine that saves the Salvatore Boarding School from the evil plans of the devil herself, Penelope Park.” 

 _Well, she’s definitely a heroin_ _-_ _something_ , Penelope thinks to herself. Despite this, she remains silent and stares at the blonde twin, emptiness in her eyes. 

“Actually, you’re definitely up to something. I haven’t heard a single quip coming from you… and that’s beyond suspicious.” 

“Oh my God,” Penelope breathes out. “Look, if I wanted to burn the school down, you wouldn’t know until it’s already in ashes. And fine, yes, I didn’t oversleep. I just didn’t want to go to class – and before you ask – no, I’m not interested in telling you the reason why. And…” 

“And what?” 

“And Jake doesn’t like you, he was just being nice. Honestly, everyone feels the same, except for probably MG but hey, you managed to screw that up too.”  

Lizzie scoffs. “You have no idea what yo—” 

“You wanted a quip or whatever and I gave it to you. Bye Lizzie.”  

Penelope whispers a spell under her breath and the door closes shut in Lizzie’s face. 

“You can’t just skip class, Penelope!” Lizzie yells through the door.  

Unaffected, Penelope rolls her eyes and waits until she hears footsteps walking away before turning around. 

“That bitch is really trying me today,” she says to herself as she sits down on her bed.  

The annoyed witch looks to her right, where an empty bed lies. She hasn’t had a roommate for the past 5 months. That was the best thing ever when her and Josie were still together. They hung out so much in Penelope’s room after her roommate left. The two girls would talk endlessly, play around with spells, cuddle in bed, all kinds of stuff, really. They even had their first time there – a moment Penelope holds close to her heart.  

Penelope’s all-time favourite memory is when Josie would sing her to sleep. She remembers the first time it happened, her girlfriend was so scared of getting in trouble for being there too late; but the soft-hearted twin easily gave in when Penelope gave her a kiss and asked her to stay, pout and all.  

Wrapped in each other’s arms and with Penelope’s head laying on her chest, Josie softly sang the melody to Venus by Sleeping At Last. The green-eyed girl swears she’s never felt magic like that before; Josie’s heartbeat in one ear and gentle voice in the other. Penelope could’ve stayed like that forever, but as the words ‘ _you’re the universe I’m helpless in’_ floated in the air, her eyelids became heavy and she drifted to sleep. 

When Penelope woke up the next day, she was still entangled in Josie’s arms. She’d never felt happier. She was so content that not one insult came Lizzie’s way when they were facing her wrath during breakfast. 

Looking back, Penelope regrets not telling the insufferable twin that her yellow tie matched her teeth that day because if it wasn’t for her, she wouldn’t be sitting in her bedroom alone right now. 

The short-haired witch ponders over the twins for a moment but ultimately decides that she shouldn’t be so petty because none of it matters anymore. Josie’s finally doing something for herself and she was right when she argued that she can take care of herself. Well, not entirely. In the past, Josie certainly couldn’t, and she didn’t even have enough energy to try because her twin absorbed it like a solar panel. But maybe now that she’s going after Rafael, maybe this is the start for her. Interfering with it might just make it more difficult for Josie – even if it really fucking hurts Penelope.  

In all honesty, she didn’t think that the timid twin would actually go after Rafael. Though Penelope knew that they had kissed before, she didn’t think anything of it – especially when Josie kissed her back a few days ago. To be fair, Josie _did_ walk away as if she had just committed a crime and abandoned her afterwards; but, and as much as Penelope wouldn’t like to admit it, she was secretly hoping that Josie wanted her more than she did Rafael.

Either way, Penelope got distracted because getting Josie to want her isn’t the goal. It never was. The goal is for Josie to understand that her wants and needs matter too – that _she_ matters. Penelope is willing to do anything for her to realize that, even if Josie hates her when she does. If anything, she shouldn’t have let herself believe that she’d get the girl in the end. 

As the witch sits on her bed and her thoughts, feeling especially pathetic, she remembers that this whole sulking thing she’s doing in her room isn’t what Penelope Park does. She takes a deep breath, gathering herself and re-focusing on the end game. Energized, Penelope takes a glimpse at the clock and realizes it’s almost lunch time. 

When Penelope enters the dining hall, she sees Josie almost instantly. She’s sitting beside Lizzie, and across from them is Rafael. Wanting to avoid any kind of interaction with the group, she sits at the table farthest from Josie, two rows of tables away. She finds herself amongst vampires, one of them being MG.  

“Hey Peez, feeling better?” MG asks as Penelope sits down across from him so that she has a clear view of Josie’s table. 

“Feeling better?” 

“Yeah, Lizzie said you missed the morning classes because you had cramps.” 

“Oh... yeah, sure I’m feeling better,” Penelope replies, as she looks around the table. “So, MG, you wanna tell me why you’re hanging out with these guys? Didn’t they, like, stab you in the back when they voted for Kaleb instead of you?” 

Heads turn towards Penelope and she feels their vexed glares. She starts eating her food nonchalantly, as if she didn’t say anything. 

MG’s chokes on his broccoli. “Woah Penelope... um, it’s fine really. Kaleb’s a cool guy, right everyone?” He smiles as he turns to the others sitting at the table, but he’s met with scowls.  

“Next time, you should try voting for someone who doesn’t peer pressure his own ‘friends’ to feed off of humans,” Penelope remarks, briefly looking at the others and then MG. 

The nervous vampire smiles and says, “Penelope, please don’t say that,” through his teeth. 

As he speaks, however, the other vampires collectively get up and move to the empty table the next row over, murmuring amongst themselves. 

MG groans and frowns at Penelope. “Really, P, you did not have to do that.”  

“Really, MG, I did. I didn’t want to be eating lunch by those backstabbing sheep. Besides, you deserve better.”  

“Okay, first of all, you could’ve just sat at that empty table. Second of all, don’t you have better things to do like, oh I don’t know, mocking the twins about the fact that their mom is leaving today?”  

“Wait, she’s leaving already?”  

“Yeah, Lizzie was just having a breakdown about it earlier.”  

“Hm, good to know. Speaking of, you’re over her now, right?” 

“Well, yes—or I was, but I don’t know, she’s been really nice to me since she came back.”  

“Oh really? Then why is Raf sitting with her and you’re not?” Penelope shifts her eyes to where the twins were sitting and MG turns around to look.  

The short-haired girl realizes that Josie isn’t sitting there anymore as the sulking vampire looks at her again. 

“I don’t know, she just had a breakdown so I wasn’t sure if I should, you know...”  

Penelope finishes eating then looks directly in MG’s eyes. 

“You, lover vamp, need to find someone new,” she says to him. “Preferably someone who doesn’t think that the world revolves around them.”  

“I don’t know, P.” 

The short-haired witch gets up from her seat. 

“Okay well, when you find your brain cells, let me know. In the meantime, do you know where the headmistress is?” 

“I think she’s in the library – wait, what are you up to?” 

Penelope simply smiles at the suspicious vampire and then leaves to put away her tray and make her way to the library.  

In hindsight, the witch probably should have considered the fact that Josie was no longer in the dining hall, because when she enters the library, she’s met with not only the headmistress’ eyes but also Josie’s.  

“Oh, Penelope! Good to see you, dear. I was just telling Josie that I have some very important work that I have to do, meaning I really can’t stay, even though I know she’d like me to. She doesn’t believe me, but would you mind reassuring her that I will be back soon enough? Maybe she’ll listen to her girlfriend.”  

The witches’ eyes widen as they are startled by Caroline’s suggestion. 

Clearing her throat, Penelope stammers, “We’re uh n—” 

“We’re not together anymore, mom,” Josie continues in a low voice, shifting her eyes to the ground. 

Caroline gasps, “Oh- Oh, right! I’m so sorry, Ric told me but I...,” her voice fades as the air is suffocated by the tense silence.  

The three stand there for a moment, Josie avoiding eye contact whilst Penelope gives Caroline a reassuring smile.  

“It’s fine, Mis—” 

“Caroline is fine, honey.”  

“Right. It’s fine, Caro—”  

“I’m gonna go,” Josie interrupts.  

“Wait Josie, you don’t have to go.” 

“I’ll talk to you later, mom.” 

The dark-haired twin hurriedly makes her way to the doors, brushing past Penelope. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intervene,” Penelope says once Josie is gone. 

“It’s alright, I don’t seem to be saying anything right, anyways.”  

Caroline sighs as she stacks a few books on a table. “So, Penelope, are you here to do some light reading?”  

“Actually, I’m here to talk to you.” 

“Oh?”  

“Yeah,” Penelope starts, making her way closer to Caroline. “I wanted to tell you about a drug ring at school – actually, it’s more like a human blood ring, but you know what I mean.” 

“And you’re telling me instead of Dr. Saltzman because?”  

“Well, I _was_ going to tell him, but he’s been super busy with all of these weird monsters lately. I didn’t think adding to his list of problems would be helpful. Besides, you run the school too, so I thought you might want to get involved instead.” 

“What about Mr. Williams?” 

“He’s been busy helping out Dr. Saltzman – all of the staff, really, have been preoccupied with the monsters. They haven’t exactly been in touch with what’s been going on amongst the students.” 

Caroline chuckles as she begins to realize what Penelope is trying to do. 

“Ah, and you’re telling me this because you’re concerned about the student body and not because you’re trying to convince me to stay longer for Josie’s sake, right?”  

The short-haired girl laughs, slightly admitting defeat, “Well, it might be a little bit of both,” she says. 

The blonde mother thinks over her options for a little bit and after a while replies, “Okay Miss Penelope Park, I’ll see what I can do.” 

Penelope grins. “So, you’re saying you’ll stay for a few more days?” 

“Three, at most. You can tell the girls yourself. Three days, but if we can’t stop this ‘human blood ring’ thing you speak of by then, we’re handing it over to Dr. Saltzman.”  

“Yeah, I’ll tell them – wait...  _we_?” 

“Yes, is there a problem?” 

Penelope raises her eyebrows in shock. This is not what she signed up for.


End file.
